第九百七十七章 老腰保卫战与三角带
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第九百七十七章老腰保卫战与三角带(第1/2页)
这路是真不咋地,前两天刚下过一场秋雨,大车一压,那就是一道道没过脚脖子的硬棱子。
李卫东开着后面那辆红旗,眼瞅着前头那辆车屁股后面卷起漫天的黄烟,跟那刚出笼的野马似的,转眼就没影了。
他在后面油门踩到底,发动机嗷嗷叫,可那是真追不上。
不是车不行,是这心里头有顾忌。
副驾驶上,王淑芬脸色煞白,一只手死死抓着那个还没拆封的水果罐头瓶子,另一只手捂着胸口,眉毛拧成个死疙瘩。
“慢点!你赶着去投胎啊?”王淑芬终于没忍住,那是哇地干呕了一声,虽然没吐出来,但把李卫东吓得一激灵,赶紧点了脚刹车。
“这个瘪犊子玩意儿!”
李卫东一巴掌拍在方向盘上,气得胡子都翘起来了,
“平时看他还挺憨厚,这一摸上方向盘,咋跟那吃了耗子药似的?这么颠的路,他也不怕把我那大孙女给颠坏了!”
看着前面那连尾灯都瞧不见的土路,李卫东这火气那是噌噌往天灵盖上窜。他是心疼孙女,更心疼老伴,但这股子邪火总得找个地儿撒。
“等着,等回了朝阳沟的。”李卫东咬着后槽牙,眼里闪过一道那是只有当年进山打猎时才有的凶光,
“我非得找老五不可。彪子这小王八蛋是皮痒了,一般的皮带怕是抽不动他那身那猪皮。回去我就把那拖拉机上的三角带卸下来,让老五沾着凉水抽!不给他抽掉一层皮,我就不姓李!”
前面那辆车里,气氛倒是截然不同。
彪子正把着方向盘,跟着那车载收音机里吱哇乱叫的二人转哼哼呢。
这货那是真把这破土路当成了平坦的大马路,方向盘在他手里跟玩具似的,左一轮右一轮,躲着路中间的大坑。
“阿嚏——!”
这一声喷嚏打得那是惊天动地,把车顶棚都震得直颤悠。
彪子那大脑袋猛地往前一探,差点撞在挡风玻璃上,那是把旁边正给闺女掖被角的李山河都吓了一跳。
“你要死啊?”李山河没好气地踹了他一脚,
“吓我一跳。感冒了?还是刚才在商店买东西穿少了?”
彪子揉了揉那个通红的鼻子,一脸的迷茫,那眉头皱得能夹死个苍蝇。
他放慢了点车速,一只手离开方向盘,在那后脑勺上使劲挠了两下,发出沙沙的响声。
“不是感冒,二叔,我这体格子你还不知道?那是冬天光膀子敢去冰窟窿里洗澡的主。”
彪子那一双牛眼珠子里透着股子没来由的心虚,说话都带着颤音,“俺咋感觉这后脊梁骨发凉呢?就在刚才那一下子,那个啥……天灵盖发麻,左眼皮子还突突地跳。
二叔,你说俺是不是冲着啥了?这又要回家了,能不能是那路边的孤魂野鬼看俺这阳气重,想借我身子暖和暖和?”
李山河本来正拿着个奶瓶在那晃荡,想试试温,一听这话,差点没把奶瓶给扔了。
“你可拉倒吧!”
李山河扑哧一声乐了,那笑声里全是嘲讽,
“还孤魂野鬼?你看看你这长相,那鬼见了你都得绕道走,怕你管人家要买路钱。你这就是那这就是那就是心里头有鬼。”
彪子还是不放心,透过后视镜往后面瞅了一眼,除了漫天的黄土,啥也没有。
“二叔,你还别不信。这玩意儿那是邪乎着呢。
你还认不认识别的尿性人?
那种能跳大神、看事儿的?
要不回村之前,咱们先找个明白人给俺破破?
俺这心里头那是真没底,总觉得那是有一顿好打在前面等着俺呢。”
李山河把奶瓶递给后座的张宝兰,转过身,看着彪子那副怂样,那嘴角往上一挑,那是看透了一切的坏笑。
“我看你不用找大仙,你这就是你那俩篮子子儿方你。”
“啥?篮子方我?”彪子一愣,低头瞅了一眼自个儿裤裆,一脸的懵,“这玩意儿还能方人?二叔你别在那扯犊子,你当俺是范老五那虎逼哨子呢。”
(本章未完,请点击下一页继续阅读)第九百七十七章老腰保卫战与三角带(第2/2页)
“咋不能方人?”
李山河从兜里掏出烟,想点又没点,就在那鼻子上闻那个味儿,“你想想,你这只要一回家,是不是就得交公粮?
你那媳妇刘晓娟,那是什么体格子?
那是能扛着麻袋跑的主。
这好些日子没见着你,那不得把你这身子骨给榨干了?
你这是那是本能的害怕,那是你那俩腰子在给你报警呢!”
一听到刘晓娟这三个字,刚才还把着方向盘在那得瑟的彪子,那脸色瞬间就变了,变得那是比吃了苦瓜还难看。
“二叔,你别吓唬我。
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